Andrew, even though I think that your last challenge was made in jest, I will answer it seriously. You chastise me for using ancient arguments, yet this is one of the oldest alleged paradoxes used to challenge the character of God.
When we say that God is omnipotent, we say that He can do all possible things. In other words, God is bound by the laws of logic. For example, God could not make a square circle because circles are mutually exclusive of squares and vice versa. In the same way, when arguing that God could not create a rock so heavy that He cannot lift it, is in fact nonsensical. Asking if, "God can create a rock so heavy that even he cannot lift it? is just as much nonsense as asking if, "Can God create a square circle?" It is a logical contradiction. Namely, it is a logical contradiction to say to talk of God's simultaneous ability and disability to lift the rock. Put another way, the statement "God can lift this rock" must have a truth value that is either true or false; they cannot both be true at the same time. Thus, the question and the perceived paradoxes which you pose are, actually meaningless; they are illogical.
As a side note, the questions that you pose have to do with God's character, not His existence. I am happy to defend God's character, but I did not think we were there yet.
Also as a side note, God cannot and will not make you love Him. Thus, one example of a rock that cannot be lifted is your heart.